Today was quite a messy & hectic day, so was this whole week. But today was different. Left half an hour early to Bible College (that’s at 8 a.m) just so that I could begin to practice punctuality, only to find a 40 foot container fallen right across the road creating a mega traffic block. Dang !!! My coming early was worthless, got to the class 10 minutes late as usual…Sigh !
It was burning hot and humid that all I wanted to do was go home and chill, but heard that Aunty Vasanthi was discarding some books before she shifted to her new place and wanted me to come pick up what I wanted. Wowy !!! Em books were marvelous, Encyclopedias, Dictionaries and series & series of books. I felt like a billionaire coz em books would sure cost around 25’000.00 or more if I were to buy it from the stores now.
Came home and fell flat asleep for more than 3 hours straight, only to figure out that I had promised Razor that I’d be turning up at the Autolanka get together. The sticky weather tempted me to stay in and chill, but got in to some grubby clothing and dashed away to greet the waiting Razor…hehehe. It was all good, em guys with RPM on their mind were a tad incomprehensive though.
Tried to make an excuse for not turning up at Jeremy’s party coz “My Munkey” would be there, but since he insisted, me went with sweaty palms and butterflies in me stomach coz I was sure it would be an awkward, long party. I was so wrong, “My Munkey” came and spoke to me, he looked mysterious as ever & my heart shattered in to smithereens, coz he wasn’t mine (& never will be) . Will he ever belong to anyone else? He looked quite straight; I couldn’t digest the fact that he was inclined the other way. We danced awhile, and that seemed to be the best moment in my entire life.
I couldn’t hang in there for long watching him. What we had was lost and he would be gone before I know it. Gone forever. Why him! I keep wondering. May be coz he is just so unreachable, untouchable and unfathomable. I sure thought that I could rest in peace once I knew for sure, but it just isn’t so. This will always, always remained an unfinished story. I wonder if I’d forget about him totally and move on once I fall in love with another……..I wonder, wonder…I keep wondering……
1 comment:
the sweaty palms and butterflys in the stomach.... yea they are the times when u really feel like the world's moving so slowly eh? and everytin around u seems to go in slow motion...
"some questions never have any answers" .. thats something I never want to believe in, cos I always have an attitude where I have an answer for every problem or question.
but alas, its not always da case...
best of luck, Judith... I hope u will get through all these rough times!
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