Halloweeeen…boooohhuahahahahaaha !!!!

Just a lil something me found out about the dark day…….It sounds gibberish…but it’s the truth…the whole truth and nothing but the dangerous truth !!!

There are many versions of halloween. This is one of them :-

Do some major Deliverance on yourself for ever celebrating halloween. Burn any left over halloween stuff in your home. Don't even open your doors to pass out "tracts". If you do, then you are celebrating this unholy day.

No matter what you think of halloween, know that it is the very highest satanic holy day. As a Christian, you should not be observing it in any way, especially IN your church. The catholic church is responsible for this day to be placed in the church.

Halloween has never been a Christian holiday, and it has no place in the life of a born again Believer in JESUS CHRIST. In fact, it is an abomination to God, and we should take our stand firmly against it. As we look at its history, we find that its roots go deep into heathenism, paganism, satanism and the occult; and its modern expression is no better.

HISTORY OF HALLOWEEN

Celtic New Year
October 31 is the most important day in the satanic year. [It is known as the devil's birthday.] It marks the Celtic new year. It was the end of the growing season. It became a festival of death. On this day, the god of the Celtics was to have called up the spirits of the wicked dead who had died during the past year. At the same time, other evil spirits arose and went about the countryside harassing the people. On October 31, the Celtics expected to be harassed by ghosts, evil spirits and demons; and it was no fun and games to them. They would light bonfires to guide the spirits to their own town and to ward off evil spirits.

DRUIDS
The Celtics had priests called druids. On October 31, the druids went from house to house demanding certain foods, and all those who refused were cursed. The people were tormented by means of magic. As they went, the druids carried large turnips which they had hollowed out and on which they had carved demon faces as charms. Each one was believed to contain the demon spirit that personally led or guided that priest: his little god.

DIVINATION
Those who practiced fortune telling and divination found that this was the night that they had the most success. They called upon satan to bless their efforts. One form of divination was to put apples in a tub and bob for them. The one who first successfully came up with one without putting them in his teeth was to have good luck throughout the year. They would then peel the apples and throw the peeling over their shoulders and then quickly look around. They expected to see a vision or an apparition of the one they were to marry.

SACRIFICES
These things happened several centuries before CHRIST. Sacrifices were made to the gods, especially the god of death - Samhain (pronounced Sah win). Sacrifices all the way from vegetable to human were offered. This went on and on, and, in some parts of the world, still goes on today.

8th CENTURY
In the 8th century, the Pope, in an effort to get the people to quit the festival of Sam hain, invented All Saints Day (Nov. 1). This was an attempt to get the people to turn away from the horrible observance of Sam hain. All Saints Day was intended to honor the martyrs of the Roman persecutions. It did not work! It never works to Christianize a pagan holiday. The holy and the profane do not mix.

THE MIDDLE AGES
In the Middle Ages, there was a great revival of satanic practices and witchcraft and magic - like there is today. During this time the belief developed that witches traveled on broomsticks to the black Sabbaths to worship Satan on October 31. They were guided by spirits in the form of black cats. The Druids worshiped cats believing them to be reincarnated evil people.

CHURCH INVOLVEMENT
This festival of death has survived all the efforts of the church to stamp it out. The church is joining the opposition by celebrating this festival.
All Saints Day became All Hallows Day. Hallow means holy or sacred. October 31 is the evening before All Hallows Day and came to be called in the western world all hallows evening and then all hallows een. Een is an abbreviation for evening. Finally, the word was reduced to the way we have it today, Halloween. That's where the name came from, and even if it is called all hallows evening, it has nothing to do with Christian faith, and it never did.

MODERN HALLOWEEN
Now let's look at the present day celebration of Halloween. Isn't the whole theme one of darkness, death, fear, threats, destruction and evil? There are witches, broomsticks, bats, owls, ghosts, skeletons, death, and monsters. You dress up your children as demons and witches and ghouls and monsters and werewolves and send them out into the street in the darkness to reenact the Druids' practice of demanding food from people under threat of tricks (or curses) if they don't comply.

You take, not a turnip, but a pumpkin and carve demon faces in it and decorate with it.
At Halloween there will be apple bobbing, divination, fortune telling, haunted houses, candles lit and spirits called up. There will be seances and ouija boards in the name of fun and excitement. There will be sacrifices of dogs, cats, rats, chickens, goats and even humans!

You say, "Well, we don't take it seriously." But the devil does and so does God. Particularly this is true when the Church which He purchased with His own precious blood builds houses of horror in its fellowship halls so that the little lambs who have been entrusted to its care can be terrified and opened up to invading spirits of fear and torment and confusion.

How this must Grieve the Lord!

No one can dabble in the occult and come away unshackled. It is not harmless games and fun. Occult involvement whether done innocently or not, is disobedience to God's Word. When people ignore God's warning and enter a forbidden realm, they witness spiritual phenomenon. The Devil does have supernatural power. However, everything he does for people, he requires payment. The result of occult involvement causes oppression, depression, confusion, delusion, and physical ailments of all sorts.

Trick and Treat is the fun time of many unsuspecting children and adults, but the "trick" is really on the one who is playing right into the trap of the devil. Halloween is a day of celebration for the devil and his worshipers.

Bonfires: The original word is bone fires. The bones of the sacrificed animals or humans said to appease Satan and endue his followers with heightened powers. Brooms for witches, wiccans, etc: Were and are used as part of a coven ceremony to heighten sexual frenzy and evoke more demonic powers. Pumpkins on porches with candles: Pumpkin on porch showed the people in the house has appeased evil spirits by giving of food, etc. Candle in it showed the people had not given anything. A member of their family was taken for sacrifice in the bone fire, while inward parts, usually fatty parts were put in the center of the hollowed out gourd with a wick in it. This appeased the gods of the druids and cursed the people in the house.

Sacrifices: The most pleasing sacrifice to Satan is something pure. The highest is a child, preferably newborn. Next a virgin, next an animal.

Prayers on Halloween Eve: Christians not informed about warfare and the power of the blood of Jesus are primary targets. Every curse imaginable is loosed this night with heightened power to bring them to pass. Some are immediate curses, some are curses that are spread out through the year, and some are "specialized curses". Terror and fear are always sent with each curse to the victim.All holidays are paganistic: Easter (goddess of fertility), Christmas (many pagan and idol things). The one totally dedicated to Satan and his followers is Halloween.

The decision is up to you…Still wanna go trick or treating…still wanna go to the most happa Halloween party in town????? Hmmmm……….

A brand new beginning….(The death of the Lustful and Seductive Spirit)

I strive for something different, something entirely different. I’m sick of the mundane existence of the youth. Studies, work, partying, clubbing, dawg watching….dating, relationships….etc…etc… I’ve been striving to achieve this totally different life from so long ago, but always got carried away with the current of the waves of wild existence……I want to and will to make all the sacrifices needed to achieve this from here on.

So, I’m weird…..a lil cocky…tipsy….I speak the unwanted, I use the most wrong phrases at the worst timing…yeah…my timing is always wrong...I’m a girl who doesn’t like soppy pansy stuff, including butterflies which is my worst phobia….hmm……It’s me birthday today……My phone was squeaking from 12 midnight….was brutally woken up by well wishers…heheehehe (it’s all good though)….this is when I sat up wondering who I really am…………I ain’t a strange being…no I ain’t…I’m perfectly normal…..I’m just an artist striving to express me self……….I just ain’t your average female……phew….now that I’ve got that straightened out……and no…I ain’t a rebel anymore.

I’ve got it all figured out…at least when I am 22…..praise the good lord…It’s still 10 a.m and me need me glorious work out to keep me going, haven’t trained in 2 days……..but overall today is gonna be a day of peace, a good day………A freaking glorious day………….

Well….the mega question being whether or not me gonna have a bash today…and whether or not I am gonna have a party today? Geeeez…why in the world would I want to celebrate the fact that I am getting older…tehehehehe…….nah….jus kidding…I shall celebrate it, but not right now..

The preaching at church was glorious…..It’s amazing how Satan grabs one’s peace of mind…..and the worst attacked are the believers of God… The evil one blinds you and takes you through situations, making you compromise good for the sake of evil and the non righteous acts…..It’s crazy how one can walk through life feeling so fulfilled, but still so unfulfilled without knowing the truth of life. What purpose is life, if the purpose of the heavenly one is not fulfilled through it?

I could fall on my knees a million times and repent a zillion times….but the fact remains that I am still unworthy to be forgiven. Below is a track that I keep playing over and over again…..it reminds me as to how blessed I am to receive his blessings, dirty as I am.

Why me Lord

Why me Lord, what have I ever done,
To deserve even one, of the pleasures I’ve known,
Tell me Lord, what did I ever do,
That was worth loving you, all the kindness you’ve shown.

Lord help me Jesus, I wasted it so..
Help me Jesus, I know what I am
Now that I know, that I needed you so..
Help me Jesus, my soul’s in your hand

Try me Lord, if you think there’s a way,
I could try to repay, all I’ve taken from you.
May be Lord, I could show someone else,
What I’ve been through myself on my way back to you.

Just Him & Me !!!

It's been awhile since I updated the blog. Wasn't in an expressive mood the past week. I faltered once more, but guess it put an end to the last evil bondage in me. It ain't a life long struggle to get out of darkness, it really isn't. But it sure takes quite awhile. My mind is messed up...way messed up (right now). Guilt doesn't come over me anymore when I falter, It's hurt....hurt in my soul....shame that I've hurt my blessed master....The one who loves me dearly.....the one who shed his very blood for me......

Had a chat with a friend who I had lost touch with for a couple of years, this Friday..the whole topic was about being unequally yoked with a non-believer. I found it so right some years back, but now I find it so wrong. But she, who found it wrong some years back, is compromising on the point. A Christian ain't a living breathing human being who goes by the book, there are no laws that bind them. A Christian is a being made in the mighty ones own image who walks in the love of the Lord....he leads, we follow. We are not to trust our own strength or our own instincts. We fall, they make us fall, we make our selves fal,but rise up again and walk in his love....walk strong, straight and tall.

Conviction :- As I write this, something came over me..I couldn't take it any longer....The sin I had committed had to be confessed, I was ashamed to face my heavenly father directly...I just couldn't.All I could do was call my mentor and cry.....though I didn't state the calibre of the sin, I knew that he understood, thank God for all the Godly people he's brought in to my life...He didn't rub in the wound, he didn't condemn me,he didn't judge me.....he reminded me that God's forgiveness was inexhaustible.

1 John 1 : 7-9
7 But, if we are living in the light of God's presence, just as Christ does, then we have wonderful fellowship and joy with each other, and the blood of Jesus his Son, cleanses us from every sin.
8 if we say that we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves, and refusing to accept the truth.
9 But if we confess our sins to him he can be depended on to forgive us and cleanse us from every wrong.
[And it is perfectly proper for God to do this fro us because Christ dies to wash away our sins]

I hate myself for letting the wrong conquer (no, don't tell me that I am harsh on myself....how can I strive to be good and give permission for the bad to dwell in me) ?

I've never been this convicted before, The area in my life that kept me away from God is broken, I feel it and I know it for sure. I cried out to the Lord before I fell......I begged him to keep me away. It was for me to choose, I had the choice and I chose evil.... Forgive me God, for I have sinned.

It annoys me when non believer speaks against God coz I know the truth and have no way of making them see it.The comments I received from them vary from :-

(1) I don't think there is a God as such, just a higher power who can take any form.
(2) There exists no God, it's all in the head.
(3) There is no eternal life elsewhere....so live the life you've got to the fullest.
(4) There ain't no miracles, just coincidences.

They can't prove my beleif to be wrong, coz I've seen it to believe it. I know it ain't blind faith any more.I feel it..I feel his perfect redemption. It is sweet to be loved by him.

I have no anger, no revenge on what happened, just a striving spirit of struggle to keep away. The power of lust, the power of seduction followed me till now, but by his grace, I know I have broken all of em bondages. No more am I a slave of darkness, no more am I a slave of blindness. I wan't all his blessing, not just a part of it...I want to be his and he be mine, I ain't ready to share my love with the world and lose my privileges, and none can take it away either. The worldly are wolves in sheep skin, the good, bad and the evil, none is to be trusted, none, not one. It ain't wrong to be paranoid, coz there sure is an ulterior motive behind all of em glittering like gold. I am none to judge, but I own the right to be careful.

May the love of God be with you !!!

The past is the past for it’s own good reasons….

Hmmm….I wish the whole theatrical phase of my life ceases…It’s really getting too much to handle…hehehe….Just too overwhelming……I mean…this is amazing….I could make a movie and be an millionaire over night……Ok……so me exaggerating….

The past month…or rather the past few months have been crazy…..people from me past…or rather the so called toy boys I happen to call me exes are coming back in to the scene…..All I can remember was showering them with emotional torture (of course during me dark ages)..but, still….I really don’t understand why anyone in their right mind would come back 10 feet close to me…

It’s only 3 years back that I ever felt anything real…….the feeling of loving someone and wanting to be loved back in return….yeah that hurts……but when that one person you love….gives you the world…or rather pretends to give it to you and then suddenly grabs the rug from under your feet…..geez…that freaking hurts…really hurts……

Ever since it’s just been revenge….I’m ashamed of me self…but yes…I’ve had my share of revenge…..may be it was all about lesser magic at that time……but I broke all the bondages…..It’s all over….but looks like it isn’t…hmmmm

Every time they fall at my feet…I’m only too tempted to take them on a wild spin again…..but nah…me ain’t gonna waste any of me precious time with em, they just ain’t worth it…The thought of seeing them again sends shudders down me spine…no way……Glad to figure out that I’m actually growing up….It amazes me that some people just can’t take the word no…well…they just have to...and no, what ever attempt they make ain’t gonna get them nowhere close to me. It annoys me to know that they still have the freaking guts to speak to me…(not that they have to fear me or anything)…but may be am just surprised…

Walking with me Lord is sweeter than ever…It’s getting easier to stick to my no and yes…

Starting tomorrow…..Me gonna stay away from the internet…I donno why I choose to do so, but guess I have started appreciating me solitude….Just like hunger makes a soul stronger…solitude makes the spirit bolder and stronger…I am enjoying it in a way…I missed a series of events the past three weeks, and the best part is that I don’t really regret missing em…..I sure would lose my usual bunch of friends who hang around with me if I refuse hanging out with em over and over again…..but then again….the true ones or rather the ones worth keeping will remain……(Oh yeah...me growing up fast..)…hehehe

Escapism is easy to get carried away with……but I don’t wanna do it this time….I wanna face it like a woman…and deal with it…….Yaaaaayyyyyyyyyy !!!!!!!!!!

Before I wrap up : Your words mean nothing to me…seeing is believing……and no...I ain’t gonna marry ya....not in this life……so forget about it…you veasling your way in is only a waste of time…for you…and a waste of energy for me to tell ya over and over again that I’ve moved on…..If u ever stumble across this blog…Geez…You are blessed…and I am too…I’ll save a lotta ma breath !!!

2 Samuel 22 :29 – For thou art my lamp, O Lord : and the Lord will lighten my DARKNESS

Sometime…Somewhere

You can deny it a million times, find practical, logical explanations as to why he ain’t the one……but, you just can’t really run away from him……It annoys me not to have control of my feelings and feel the way I feel……

I Will Remember You - Sarah McLachlan

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

Remember the good times that we had?
I let them slip away from us when things got bad
How clearly I first saw you smilin’ in the sun
Wanna feel your warmth upon me, I wanna be the one

I’m so tired but I can’t sleep
Standin’ on the edge of something much too deep
It’s funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we can’t be heard

I’m so afraid to love you, but more afraid to loose
Clinging to a past that doesn’t let me choose
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light

And I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Weep not for the memories


That’s exactly what I wanna say……….Phew………..But, it just ain’t worth me hollering away….coz I seem to be invisible to him…hmm…….So….me shall…..silently admire the work of art...till he passes me by L

Had plans to crack quite a lip smacking deal today……but alas…..It didn’t go through…….I have no regrets…..coz I gave the whole thing over to the Lord before hand…and if it is not his will to give it to me…then I don’t want it J ……………As I wondered why? oh Lord why? I figured out that the mighty one didn’t want me to deal with the agent who was leading all the buyer to me……what more can I offer him than be thankful with all my heart……

Things aren’t all that rosy…rather living in a bunch of brambles……but my faith is still strong…and I know that it is more than sufficient to take me to the promised land…..a heaven on earth.

Unanswered yet the prayer your lips have pleaded,
In agony of heart these many years?
Does faith begin to fail? Is hope departing?
Say not the father hath not heard your prayers;
You shall have your desire sometime, somewhere.



Unanswered yet? Nay do not say ungranted;
Perhaps your work is not yet wholly done.
The work began when first your prayer was uttered,
And God will finish what He has begun.
If you will keep the incense burning there,
His glory you shall see sometime, somewhere.

Unanswered yet? Faith cannot be unanswered,
Her feet are firmly planted on the Rock;
Amid the wildest storms she stands undaunted,
Nor quails before the loudest thunder shock.
She knows Omnipotence has heard her prayer,
And cries “It shall be done” – sometime, somewhere.

Ophelia G. Browning

“The” decision made !!!

Nothing much to grumble about the weekend. Signed the agreements for the new property yesterday…..the whole transaction was filled with peace…..but as usual I forgot to pray about it…..I’m just too hyper to sit still…stop my mind form wandering and pray….I love the feeling that comes over me when he touches my heart.....Okios…so I had made up my mind to go for a Bible Study today….the friend I was supposed to go with had the times mixed up and was a lil reluctant to make it with me…..I first decided not to go, coz I hardly knew anyone at this place, but then again…..I felt that I had to go……Lazed around with my breakfast, watched a lil TV….and forgot all about praying…or rather wasn’t in a mood to pray…..

Got dressed in a hurry…..and just like me mum …she wanted me to hand over some goodies to the next door neighbor on me way…..so got in to me dinky toy and drove away….after driving a good 1 km. I remembered that the revenue license and the insurance was at home…..so turned back and went home to go get it…..back in to the car….and as I was about to leave the lane…remembered that I needed a lil extra cash….so back home again to borrow cash from Mums….Hmmmm..… yeaaash….I was worried….a lil too worried…..too many impediments……That’s when the brat realized that she has forgotten to have her spiritual breakfast…Doesn’t my sweet lover have extreme ways of grabbing my attention…..

The bible study was amazing…It was all about temptation and the spiritual walk a youth must lead…..It gave me all the answers I was looking for………as usual, I couldn’t handle it…..the end of the first session I was automatically drawn towards the preacher…..he ordered me to take off the black chord I had on me neck and the thumb ring I was wearing …..arrrrggghhhh…..that hurts…I loved them…….I was told to take em off before…casually, but never did….so there goes…..I feel freer than before…more at peace…….I threw away most of my tribal jewellery yesterday…and it feels great….got a few more….which I will be throwing away tonight……hmmm…….. I was freaked out about being labeled a bible thumper or a Jesus fanatic…but I simply don’t care anymore………

The preaching done by Pastor Mano and his wife Asha showed me how far behind I was…….and just how far I need to go…..I figured out why I need to stay away from both the dudes I was trying to choose between……

(1) They aren’t God’s plan for me
(2) They don’t love my master the way I love him

The drive back home was full of pondering…….I could never imagine my life with someone who doesn’t love my heavenly father the way I do….I couldn’t see my future with someone I can’t share God’s goodness and love with…hmmm……so there goes…..

Any way…overall it was an awesome day……had a mega workout….and a mega dinner…and a 2 hour telephone conversation….(errrm…now that’s a strange thing for me to do) !!!

God Bless Ya !!!

Two Prince’s

Two people in my life that I really really adore…..feel comfortable with…..I wouldn’t say that it is love….but serious infatuation…..but at the same time…..Both of them seem to be so much alike sharing so many qualities :-

(1) Seem to adore the lime light…(Which ain’t my forte)
(2) Come from Sinhalese, Buddhist Backgrounds…who’s parents seem to be detesting the very thought of settling for a tamil (I’m just making assumptions picking bits and pieces from what they say)
(3) Seem to be driven by material forces
(4) Atheists
(5) Ruled by lust
(6) Absolutely adorable (Adorable to the extreme)
(7) A few more equal qualities…too embarrassing to state…hehehe
(8) The dudes are so much alike…other than for their physical attributes...pondering about it….geez…they do share a few physical equalities as well….scary….
(9) I wonder if it is something wrong with me, that I can’t really settle for any one…long term relationships and the very word “commitment” seem to freak me out…….I’m just so darn good at running away I guess……
(10) Im tempted to chose…….just that I can’t choose…and they ain’t perfect…(but then again, who is) ???
(11) May be it ain’t real love, coz I just can’t overlook the lacking attributes….it freaks me……
(12) Both have hurt me unintentionally….which means they arem’t as responsive to others as they think they are…
(13) So I’m harsh…at least truthful……this is exactly how our minds work…..


Jewel’s track “Intuition” puts it all in so beautifully :

Intuition - Jewel

I'm just a simple girl
In a high tech digital world
I really try to understand
All the powers that rule this land
They say Miss J's big butt is boss
Kate Moss can't find a job
In a world of post modern fad
What was good now is bad

It's not hard to understand
Just follow this simple plan

[chorus]
Follow your heart
Your intuition
It will lead you in the right direction
Let go of your mind
Your Intuition
It's easy to find
Just follow your heart baby
You look at me
but you're not quite sure
Am I it or could you get more?
You learn cool from magazines
You learn love from Charlie Sheen

If you want me let me know
I promise I won't say no

You got something that you want me to sell
Sell your sin. Just cash in.
You got something that you want me to tell
You'll love me. Wait and see.

If you want me
Don't play games
I promise
it won't be in vain


Aren’t we all waiting for something better…..coz the present just seems not good enough…just not good “Enough”......always searching…and never finding…There just doesn’t seem to be a solution other other working on self contentment ...the only freaking way to happiness !!!

Its still 12.48 p.m…….and yep…I have already decided why I actually dislike one of them……hehehe…..and yeah…the other one as well……I’ve made up my mind…..no going back….no contemplating……

- Height of passion seems too uncompassionate
- Tenderness just seems so rough
- Humour…rugged and harsh
- Thoughts in-depth, but still shallow
- Perfect, but still so imperfect

** So I'm messing around..................hehehe.......

Vengeance of a tortured dinky toy !!!!

Last night was all so cold and cozy….slept like a baby. Tried to convince me mum to take a cab in the morning since I knew that the drive in peak traffic is gonna be a killer with the clutch acting strange and worn…..but seeing that long face like :gaul face” made me get ready and go drop her….hehehe…..


Had a boisterously rocking time purchasing the clutch plates and other lil bits and pieces for the car…this includes the picturesque sight of the jacks loitering down “Panchikawatta” with em eyes goggling, lapping tongues and drooling caves (I so don’t get em….have stopped trying to figure out em brains of the uncultivated rascals).

The car was smooth as silk till I reached Armourstreet, when I felt the car suddenly wobbling like a jelly fish and making jumpy jerky movements…..my lungs almost gave in when I saw the smoke puff outa the bonnet…I freezed…..that horrible day…11th June 2003 flashed in fronta me eyes…..smoke….flaming car…..explosion…to condemning the majestic 4 wheeler….

I didn’t know what I was doing……I stopped the car in the middle of the road…opened the bonnet and jumped out to the pavement…..I was shivering away…I couldn’t help it……a stupid jack ass of a cop came and asked me to move the car towards a corner….I mumbled something and continued shivering…..by then. My dad had taken control of the situation and was trying to open the radiator…..I still couldn’t reach normalcy, I couldn’t think straight….A kind gentleman came by and offered to drive it to a corner, coz I was screaming away refusing to manure the vehicle in it’s state of steam and smoke…..(Who ever he is…may he be blessed…guess he parked his own vehi and came to help…I really wouldn’t know….but I am truly thankful to God and to him)

Okios…so we got some water from a near by house and poured it in and started heading towards Union place……but not even 100 metres from where we began I had an uneasy feeling about the whole journey…and the building up traffic which was almost coming to a stagnated standstill petrified me. Thank God my instincts told me to pull over and check it up again…..the Jacks who fixed me Clutch plates have forgotten to fix the radiator fan switch….and there was no way to keep the water cool….Dads did some jiggery-pockery with the whole thing…but the fan just wouldn’t start…..Called dear old Ceylinco and lingered by the road side for almost and hour for the guy to arrive…..and miraculously the fan did start working after seeing the technicians face. Wooohoo…..

In addition to the trauma of being inside a steaming car for the second time….I got an ear full of a lecture form me mother superior for not giving the car over to its agent….for being too stingy (in my mind it’s saving money….I’ll choose me garage dudes any day) !!

The evil one has been attacking me in every way he can these few weeks….Why…coz he just can’t stand the fact that I am walking in faith…following me master in heaven…..well..I just got to tell him one thing….He will never be able to mess with my faith….not this time…..he can take me to the depths of hell and back…I’ll still be sane with the strength of my master who will provide me shelter………I have a story in the bible to back me up “Job”………I do get vexed, frustrated, depressed at times….coz I’m only human after all….but no…never beaten….not until I hang on to my dear friend, lover, saviour and my all…….In (Romans 12 : 9-21) he has clearly stated that “Vengeance is his and that it is up to him to repay”…..and I count my fingers for the day he repays the evil one J

A lil about me and me alter ego.....

* Don't dare judge me....I am what I am....and I just might not be what you see....so if you really want to judge..."GO JUDGE SOMEONE ELSE" :-)

Phone Habits

(1) My phone is with me 24/7/365, It is switched off only when I do not want to be disturbed. If I don't answer your call, or call you back, either I don't want to speak to you right then or never want to be hassled by you ever again.

(2) I do reply most of the sms's I get, unless other wise they are forwardings. Me not replying a message would mean that I find it lame, stupid, annoying or just don't want to communicate with you. If I don't reply a significant number of your messages at a stretch, I expect you to get the message that I don't want your number appearing on the screen of my phone...If you don't seem to figure this out, then your either sitting on your comprehension power or a plain retard

* retard = a person backward in mental or physical development

(3) The maximum times I will attempt to get through to a person is twice or on rare occasions thrice...If you fail to answer me or reply my message...I shall not bother with you ever.....I consider you an unfortunate earthling to have missed the opportunity to converse with me :)

(4) If you owe me something, then expect to be bugged, till you come up with a proper explanation or return what you owe me....(I don't expect you to return what ain't important to me, if I never ask you to make it your own, yeah...then it is darn important) !!!

(5) If I owe you something, don't worry...I wouldn't run away with it…I will return what ever I owe you in full...Yes, I will be polite enough to call you and give you an explanation if there involves any delay...but...Big “BUT " only if you would be sweet enough not to pounce on me like a starved Ethiopian Cannibal...or make my day go worse than it already is"

(6) Don't send me stupid sms's asking me how I am doing....I will either say...I'm doing good...ok or all right (you can be sure that it is always positive)....so don't bother. Try starting a conversation with a melodious note instead.

(7) I don't want to be called numerous times a day to be talked to...no...I ain't a puppy wanting to be spoken to 24/7...I appreciate my space.....solitude.....and dislike small talk....

(8) Don't dare call me up and expect to be entertained...no...I ain't a clown...and don't be too assured that I'll make your day and illuminate your darkness.

(9) I will only message you or call you if I like the living, breathing earthling you are....(I said like.....not LOVE)

(10) If I have ever fallen in love with you...I wouldn't use the phone or sms to confess it...I'll look deep in to your eyes...make you lifeless and then say it....(so don't let your imagination run riot, save it for a rainy day) !!!

(11) I sure judge you by the tone of your voice.....so when in a conversation if your tone is groggy or lazy….I rate you as uninteresting...or just not in the mood to talk.....don't blame me If I pretend to be busy and run away...I hate uninteresting, unresponsive conversations.

(12) If you’re a guy...don't dare call me when you are drunk....I don't appreciate drunk conversations either.

(13) Don't dare giving me nuisance calls....they don’t really affect me....so don't waste your time and money....(just a warning to save your resources)

(14) Don't dare declare any sort of feelings you got towards me using a telephonic equipment or worst of all don't dare do it in disguise / anonymous...In my mind you'll only be an ordinary coward with absolutely no self confidence, what-so-ever.

(15) If I don't answer the phone with a sweet note.....then may be...I'm pretending not to like you.....hehehe


Relationships & Nick Naks

(1) If I ever hang out with you twice...then you can be assured that I don't detest you (I never said like or love)

(2) If I ever tell you that I love you casually...don't believe me...(I just might be kidding around to find out your true intentions/ulterior motives....yeah...I'm cautious. I don't find anything wrong with it)....Coz if I'm really in love with you...I wouldn't be harping about it....I'd never say it....

(3) If I ever tell you that I needa get away from you....then I gotta be really hooked on to you....I'm just trying to find out, whether you really want me to stay or not...or who knows...may be I really want to run away from you...hehehe

(4) If I really do adore you...then I'll try not to meet your eye...( reasons withheld)

(5) I am bad at non-committed relationships....and I will always hate you for even considering it...(I'll try my best to forgive you....but I'm only human)

(6) If you've figured out that I like you...and I still ignore you at times....may be….just may be you've hurt me....and I don't really want to confront you or get hurt again...

(7) No...I don't appreciate you talking about other women...when in a conversation with me...I'm weird...I don't get jealous....I'd simply lose respect and cut you off....

(8) Exception :- I will talk about other guys and check em out along with you until I am sure you are exactly what I want or rather worth my time and energy.....You'll make it some where, if you hang in there...may be I like to know how possessive you truly are.

(9) If you are Aunty Monica's jealous cat...shooooo away......don't even bother...If you are too possessive I'm sure to get ticked off....but then again if you are too less possessive. I’ll take it as a sign of unconcern and lameness....tehehe

(10) Don't expect me to understand reasons why you did unofficial coffee/movie/lunch/dinner with another woman....Coz I don't want to understand.....hahaha...I'm a living, breathing radar...I'd know your true intentions by afar....So don't dare play around...I’ll make you cry and get you running off to your Mommy.

(11) If I am committed to you or absolutely, spot on in love with you.....then you can be assured not to find me doing any of the above or further, with any one else other than YOU....(ooops...who am I kidding) !!!

(12) No...I don't like you if you have a tendency to live by other's approval...I expect you to have a mind of your own.

(13) Neither do I want you to be every body's everything....

(14) I don't appreciate emotionless men...I find them mechanically inhuman and rather disgusting.

(15) Yes...I expect you to remember all birthday's and anniversaries...you won't be excused, unless other wise u are very sick and about to die...

(16) Ermm....no....I have no intention of eating "Coconut Sambol" and " Rice" every day...hehehe

(17) A teetotaler it is...If I ever catch you puffed out or boozed flat...please anticipate broken bones and teeth.

(18) A bad shaker on the dance floor is a turn off....but if you find me moving sloppy on the dance floor, please look at your self first...may be I'm just trying to keep your pace :)

(19) Don't walk towards me with ulterior motives of material/financial/physical attainments.....coz I'll just sniff you from afar...and simply cut you off.

(20) If I really, really do adore you, I'll offer you my world, just to see if you'd take it right away....(I judge you by the decision you make).

(21) If you don't believe in God, heaven and hell....don't even bother lingering around....you'll only be my friend and nothing more....(Harsh...but it's true, but I have all the reason's to be)....

(22) If you are a jerk, who approves pre-marital physical attachment, run before I fry your willy and feed my dog.

(23) If your head is filled with lust, heaven help you......coz if you dare make me an object of your lust...you’ll need more than heaven to help you !!!

(24) If you think you are superior than I am....go fly...It's up to me to decide whether or not !!!

(25) I'm sorry...I don't sell marshmallows...only over baked cookies....(If you can't comprehend what I'm trying to say...stop reading...shut down this page...adios !!! and no it ain’t anything vulgar I’m trying to say)

(26) Assuming never took any one any where... so don't. Just ask me...No...I promise, I'll try not to bite !!!

(27) Don't dare accuse me for assuming...that's just me....but If you are smart enough to keep things clear, cut and dry...then I wouldn't have to waste my time or energy assuming and trying to figure you out.

(28) Grown up's hooked...(I mean really hooked) on cartoons aren’t considered cute...I see ya as a dumb ass with an underdeveloped brain, a habitual escapist...clutching with fear to face reality.......

(29) Same goes to movies....if you've got nothing better to do than watch movies....you’re considered a jobless freak in my books.

(30) Do you know how to smile...or can I teach you how to?

(31) It's now or never.....all or nothing...no mediocrity...no procrastination.

(32) Once bitten, twice shy....No second chances in relationships. “Broken limbs can be repaired...but the scars remain”

(33) If you are looking for a lion to be caged and paraded....sorry sir...you've been misdirected...you should be looking in the zoo.

(34) Must like museums, galleries, exhibitions, country, ruggedness, stage plays, operas, books (comics don't really count), animals, rock n" retro, living on the edge....

(35) Must be....simple, artsy and inscrutable.

(36) Must loathe all techno music and stupid hip hop ...(OBSERVATION....the afore-said music lovers contradict with everything I am)...

(37) If bad is good in thee eyes....Depart !!!

(38) Getting back to artsy, if you loathe coloured hair and piercing… Depart immediately !!!

(39) If you are married and attempting to flirt with me...I'll first warn you, failing which, tell your wife and force you to a shrink, coz you sure are an insane, sordid, lewd, obscene and down right dirty bastard who deserves to be shot in the head !!!

(40) You are spiteful if you find "Samson & Delilah" and "Romeo & Juliet" stupid.

(41) I ain't a butterfly puffed up with make up, I've got no rosy cheeks, swaying hips, bright red lips, juicy butt, glossy combed hair and nice smelling feet.........Oppps...did I disappoint u ???

(42) Work out is as important as praying....if you are a pudgy lazy owl who loves to sleep and your idea of exercise is a drive to the nearest restaurant, I'm sorry you ain't my type.

(43) I consider you successful, if you succeed in teaching me the game of pool...No one's really got to the end of explaining the whole game due to the sudden out-break of “the war of the cues”. I find it a lil boring anyway.

(44) Formula Racing and drag racing is Hot !!! If you insult it, I'll only end up insulting you and making you cry.

(45) I’m just a simple and very ordinary girl and no way will I trade that for all the money in the world, so don’t expect me to.

Friends

(1) I don't expect anything from you, neither do I expect you to measure up to anything....so don't bother impressing...I like you just the way you are...

(2) If I am by any chance avoiding you...may be I got my reasons....your either a negative thinker who can't be put right...you offend me...provoke me....drive me up the wall...try to manipulate me...a serial liar, a user or an abuser.

(3) If you don't call me as often as I call you....too busy with your own stuff...don't wanna talk...don't wanna meet up...FOR A PROLONGED PERIOD OF TIME....you sure are making your way to my book of "Extinct Creatures"

(4) No...I ain't Santa Clause's girl friend...my resources are limited...this includes...time and money.....but If I can help you in any way...I would never say no...

(5) If I ever come up to you with a problem...I only want you to listen....If I ever get down to asking your opinion...I only want your opinion, and nothing else...and just coz I take your opinion, I ain't gonna act upon it blindly...all options will be weighed...so understand.

(6) Don't tell me what to do, what to feel and what to be...it ain't gonna work...coz I've got a mind of my own....so shut up and quit trying to get me to...

(7) Don't try convincing me to believe in any other religion other than what I am believing now...I'll only shoo you away or lose any respect I had or have towards you.

(8) Don't waste your time tarnishing my name.....coz what you or others think of me doesn’t really matter to me.

(9) Plz understand....I can't be there for you alwaysss.....I got a life of my own.

(10) Be frank about whether you want me around or not, coz I don't bother hanging around where I am not wanted, and no...I ain't a soothsayer, and neither can I read your mind.

(11) All women are dangerous, and yes I fear them more than uncultivated hooligans.....so if your a female, and want to be my friend...gimme time.....or if you already are....I'm sorry....I consider all women to be opportunists (horrible past experiences)....yeah...so gimme time to figure ya out !!!

(12) Where there is a female crotch, there's sure to be a man.....so if you are a guy....don't blame me if I take time to get to know you and trust you.....I'm picky, and I'm plenty proud of it.

(13) I am your guardian angel at the time of your distress, but no…...I ain’t your chauffer.

(14) My stuff are not for you to borrow and leave it unreturned....I'll simply label you a thief.

(15) I ain't perfect...I do go through messy times, where I appreciate my space....Gimme time to disappear and reappear (Go into hibernation). Ignoring you during this phase doesn't mean that I hate you...it's just my way of sobering built up toxicity.

**Finally.....I do have the authority to change the above statements as and when I want to. Adding new statements or deleting any of the existing ones doesn’t mean that I’m a highly volatile creature in any way. Change is a sign of maturity after all.

Syndrome 21

I shall be a grand 22 year old dame in a coupla days......It would be a lie if I say that the thought doesn't makes me shudder a tad bit..hehe...I’m in deeper thinking these days.....not that the people I know are making my life any easier....hehehe..I actually sat down and figured out my life a coupla days back.....there's still hope to "get a life" (",)....I really down't know where this is heading...but so many thoughts crossed my mind when driving back home today...Was thinking about all the people who have crossed me path....was thinking about my own likes and dislikes.....hmmmmm.....coulds, woulds n' shoulds...I am a less confused child than I was a coupla years back.....and yes...I can't deny the fact that I really do feel sorry for the people who are struggling hard to find themselves (including myself I guess)...Being in the lost territory ain't rosy.

It's me Dad's and Grams birthday today (two absolutely wonky characters….hehe).....After all the complaining I do about how both of them drive me up the wall (worse than an off-road drive)...I truly do appreciate all they do...I muscled up some guts to speak em appreciation to me Dad (mmmm...didn't I see that smile on his face).....I'm thrilled that at least at this ripe old age I've begun to appreciate me folks and love them unconditionally ...Who would I be without me Mum...one amazingly strong lady I've ever come across....I’m darn proud to be her product....I'm glad she put me through harsh training when I was a kid...(They've done there bunch of mistakes, but don't we all make mistake in every relationship we make)....My world is peaceful...absolutely
peaceful, (apart from the fact that the clutch plates of me dinky toy is gone for a six, and I need to loiter for more than half a day in the garage tomorrow...hate the thought...simply hate it)

The hymn "What a friend we have in Jesus" made so much sense to me today.....I remember hating the hymn, since the melody was slow and boring, plain and un-catchy......but today, it sounded all so pleasantly different...The lyrics basically solve the whole puzzle of "LIFE".

One weeka Breaka from da Net !!!

It's been a while since me spoke me mind...Walking in faith has become easier than ever....There is no greater joy in my life than trusting him, holding his hand and scampering along....
If it was genuine love that I was looking for, then it is that I have found, nothing compares to the affection I feel.....nothing in the world has touched me this deep, this often.It feels like I'm falling in love with the same person over and again...over and again...His name I was shamed to utter, his goodness I was ashamed to proclaim. but the sweetness in his voice,the loving warmth in his breath,the pleasure of following his footsteps and giving over one's life, breath & soul to him, doesn't permit one to hush his sweet name for too long. "Jesus" the beat of my heart and the life-blood in me.

It's been a more than a week since I checked me mail, or did anything with the net....ahhhh.....that hurts !!! Got a few msges from me friends while driving ma to work warning me that me mailboxes were full and mails were returning......bahhh...me gotta do something fast......sleepy eyed judy girl...walks in to a busy tech shop.....in "rubber bathroom slippers" looking like band's mistress..unbrushed teeth (stink pouring out)....(woahhh...never again).....never felt loonier...and yeah...higly anti-tech moi finally fixed the so called modem after a number of consultations and a four hour struggle.....(over with) !!!(10'000 apologies to all me bugged during the installation process)....

Weekend was a HOLLER !!! wish it was a lil longer.....