Do We Practice What We Preach ?!?

Feel the rain on your skin, No one else can feel it for you, Only you can let it in, No one else, no one else, Can speak the words on your lips, Drench yourself in words unspoken, Live your life with arms wide open, Today is where your book begins, The rest is still unwritten.
-(Unwritten – Natasha Bedinfield)-

Can’t find the answers, I’ve been crawling on my knees, Looking for anything, To keep me from drowning. Promises have been turned to lies, Can’t even be honest inside, Now I’m running backward, Watching my life wave me goodbye.
-(Running Blind – Godsmack)-

Two contradicting tracks by two artists who are worlds apart. One, absolutely bright and sunny and the other pointing directions at the dingy, dark alleys. The first one gave me hope whilst the second tore them apart. I guess it’s all about seeing the glass half empty or half full.

Yesterday was the last class on “Christian Worldview” with Karin Ramachandra. I gave her the books written by Rebecca Brown, coz I wanted to hear her opinion on the confusing content. The books state a very rigid way of looking at God’s entire creation & I ain’t liking it. Yesterday’s class made quite a massive impact on me; coz the discussion was about “relationships with the non-believers and the outside world”.

It sure wasn’t a pretty discussion, coz I was being convicted every few seconds about my past behavior towards people who didn’t share the same worldview. I’m more than convinced that just as much as it is my business to tell my loved ones about what I’ve found, I have no right to shove anything down their throat, even through pure love, but I so wish and wish they’d see the truth, before it is too late.

During the discussion, I sorted a few arguments that were tormenting my mind for days.....

(1) Just as much as Christians are uncomfortable participating in religious ceremonies held by non-believers, even marriage ceremonies, how come we insist all the guest to participate the ceremony held at church, followed by a sermon/mass to solemnize a Christian marriage. We Christians sure act selfish most of the time and that’s a fact. It’s all about us and our feelings.

What got me thinking in these lines was nothing more than a Hindu wedding I was forced to attend on Friday. I was feeling a lil awkward to make it for the wedding at all, but since I had no choice (former neighbours) I reluctantly tagged along with my family. I was relived to find out that the wedding wasn’t held in a temple after all, but in a hall. The rituals followed were fascinating to watch, even though they seemed over-rated. I got talking with Mum about what was running through my mind and oh boy! Didn’t she get a shock, coz she’s the type of person who’d think about what others would think and think twice before breaking the traditions.

But it was sure a relief to hear Karin agree with what I stated. We could make alterations according to our convictions after all.

(2) The worldview of most of the churches are quite flawed and they have no right to tie me or anyone else down to a certain denomination. Just as much as I respect the traditional churches I don’t agree with most of the stuff they do. It’s hard for me to agree, even if I try. I hate the whole concept of a rigid mass/service chanted for an hour like some sorta mantra. It just doesn’t make any sense to me.

I also hate the whole idea of Christian’s being split in to different denominations and churches. I for a fact don’t wanna belong to any of these. It’s a pity that most mature Christian’s still stick like glue to the man made law/rule that every Christian must belong to some sorta denomination.

Sir-I’m-too-holy-for-my-Halo : So Judy girl, which church do you belong to?

Moi : I’m non denominational.

Sir-I’m-too-holy-for-my-Halo : Ah? What are you saying? How come? No..no..no..you must belong to some sorta denomination, or how come you're doing the course at CTS?

Moi : Errmm… Alright, I go to 'Four Square Church', and I go to 'AOG' and I go every where else (grin grin. Smirk)

Sir-I’m-too-holy-for-my-Halo : You must eventually belong to a church, you MUST !

I don’t really see the point of doing so, I believe I have the right to walk in to any church any day and praise God with the rest of the people, share their joy (& sorrow of course). What is behind the whole man made concept of BELONGING to a certain church or denomination? “Are they greedy for our “tithe”? (I wonder)

The latter day churches are counting the number of people turning up just like a farmer would count his eggs. This is saddening! They do not love the congregation with all their heart; most are money and power hungry. This is the truth and I don’t fear to speak it.

We are just as flawed & tainted, twisted are our minds and dirty are our hearts. We claim to believe the truth but refuse to live it.

It scares me to know that I’ve been living with a flawed worldview for the past one year. If only the church taught me about the love of God and the Joy I would receive through the Holy Spirit, the beauty of the Creator as well as the Creation and about the Hope I could hold on to, I wouldn’t have made half the mistakes I made in my past.

Sadly The Catholic Church I attended till I was 14 and the Charismatic Church I attended for the past one year has failed to teach me so. So have they failed to teach the same to my parents and their generation and the previous. They are incarnated with rigid, false ideas that don’t help the act of love, joy and peace at all times. They have not been taught to put God First in their lives.

I remember all the stories about Abraham, Jacob and the gang, but not once did any one of them in authority teach me “Who I was”?, “What my Purpose was”? and “Where I was going”?.

I’m angered, even though I shouldn’t be. I wish I were of some authority to change the way the churches thought, the way they projected themselves, the way they loved and behaved. They got so much to offer and I am thankful for what ever I have learnt from them, but at the same time I am disappointed and saddened by the fact that they refuse to live out the truth.

Me think me am gonna make an attempt to live it out even if it means, getting my name tarnished and daggered down :